And so it has come to pass, that the single least qualified individual in the history of this nation to ever run for President has actually won the office via Electoral (NOT popular) vote: a racist, misogynist, narcissistic sociopath, a self-confessed serial sexual predator, a bald-faced fascist, with no grasp of history, science, geopolitics, economics, or even business (beyond filing for bankruptcy and manipulating tax law.) But we are told we must be patient of our neighbors and family who voted for this despicable swine because they (the family and neighbors, not the swine) are, after all, “all honorable men.”ⁱ

Bullshit.

Large – if not downright overwhelming – swaths of my family voted for Trump, in keeping with their Christian values … oh, excuse me, I should say, “in keeping with the lies they were instructed to believe by the paid professional liars at propaganda outlets like Fox “News” and its equivalents. While they have not (that I have seen) gone so far as to explicitly declare that Cheeto Jesus is God’s anointed prophet on Earth, they do seem to see him as advancing their “values.” You know, the values of State mandated terrorist theocracy, just the way Jesus wanted it.

Trump will bring “family values” back to center stage, with his wife’s pornographic photo spreds lending an air of morality and class to the White House that a poised, articulate, Princeton educated lawyer like Michelle Obama could never do. But at least Melania is white, so that makes it all OK. And Trump himself has such a high regard for the institution of marriage that he’s done it three times. And, being white as well as Republican, the fact that he has repeatedly cheated on his spouses and (by his own freely given admission) committed sexual assault, all is forgivable because he is, after all, an honorable man.

And I am to be patient and understanding of my family here as well, because they are all, after all, honorable.

Then there are those honorable men who voted for Trump because they despised Hillary. Hillary, after all, MUST be guilty of something, having been subjected to 30+ years of investigations. The fact that those investigations never produced even a scintilla of evidence against her only proves that she must be guilty. And we must be respectful of these cognitively vacuous assertions by the willfully deluded, because they are all, after all, honorable men.

There is another position that I will mention here; it is a very small minority holding this position, but it is a position really held. And, obviously, it is held by honorable men.

These are the gun fetishists who claimed to deplore Trump, but who were such grotesquely credulous gulls that they’d swallowed every infantile lie spoon fed to them by the NRA, and believed that storm troopers would come to their houses to seize their infantile pop-guns, were Clinton to be elected President. It is scarcely possible to imagine how anyone could actually be so stupid, but thankfully we don’t have to imagine it: just look around a bit, and you will find someone who will show you how. What is really at stake for these individuals is that they are convinced their little wee-wees will fall off if they have to go through a background check (the most that could ever have happened under Clinton) in order to purchase yet another assault weapon.

What sort of coward and hypocrite votes a single issue, when everything is at stake? But I digress, and I forget myself, because (after all) …

For Brutus is an honorable man;
So are they all, all honorable men